To my LDS Brides: Right After He Proposes

This post is directed to my LDS brides who are preparing to get married in the temple. First off, congratulations on the engagement! It's such an exciting time. The first step you need to take after you have gotten engaged and chosen a date is call the temple. Remember that they are closed on Monday's. I was engaged on a Sunday and I was so excited to call the temple and schedule a date and time and it felt like an eternity waiting until Tuesday. Anyways, call and set up a sealing time and of course when you want to take out your endowments if you haven't been through the temple yet. Usually it's up to the bride on when she wants to get her endowments out, but most brides get their endowments out a few days before the wedding. In order to set a date with the temple they need some information:

• Your full name
• Your fiancé's full name
• Your membership numbers if you have them, otherwise they can look that up
• The date and temple your husband got his endowments out
• Your addresses and phone numbers
• How many people you are expecting to come to the sealing
• The date and time you wish to get married

When you get to the "picking a time" part of the conversation they will tell you immediately if it's available or the times/dates they do have available. They will also give you sealing availability based on the size of rooms they have and how many guests you told them would attend. They will grab your e-mail addresses so they can send you information a couple months before and encourage you set up a date and time to get your endowments out if you haven't yet.  

When you schedule the sealing time you may want to plan out how the day is going to work, including the weather. Consider a 1:00pm sealing in July. Just about anywhere you'll be outside taking pictures in the mid-day sun. It will probably be sweaty and uncomfortable for you and those in attendance. Also consider a 9:00am sealing means you need to get to the temple an hour before, so 8:00am and have your hair and makeup done before then. Your day might start at 5:00am or earlier depending how long it takes to do both. Or, if you're going to a salon or a makeup counter they might not even open until 8:00am or later, unless they're giving you special treatment. In my opinion, however 11:00am is close to perfect as you can get. It gives you time to have a nice morning, get ready as needed, and avoid the heat if it's a summer wedding. There are a lot of things to consider when scheduling a sealing time and there is no perfect answer. The time may change drastically based on your individual circumstances.

If a lot of brides are getting married on the day you have chosen, then you might want to consider getting married on a weekday like a Thursday. When we were married the temple had just reopened. Even when I took my endowments out it was the first day it was open (Tuesday) in a month and the session was packed. They said that on Saturday (the 13th) they were going to have eight brides getting married so I didn't want to compete with that. On Friday (the 12th) another girl in my homeward was getting married. I didn't want to divide the attention since many of our guests would be the same people. So I decided on Thursday, August 11th at 11am which happened to be Ty's parents anniversary as well. It was a "meant to be" moment for him. Because I had chosen an "odd" day,  I lucked out and had the brides room all to myself. It turned out that there was only two other brides scheduled that day; one before me and one after me. I didn't see either of them.

My soon to be sister-in-law is in the same boat as we were. She had planned to get married Saturday, December 28th but another girl in her homeward was getting married the same day. She changed her date to Friday, December 27th as to not compete and split the ward. So bottom line, you should go into the scheduling being somewhat flexible.

I was worried that taking pictures afterwards was going to be a struggle if there was another bride close to me. I was pressed for time with the photographer and didn't want her waiting around for previous groups to move. Fortunately, that wasn't a problem for me but I have heard of it being a problem for others. Also, if you choose to get married in a more popular temple, like the Salt Lake Temple, expect to see many brides jostling for photo spots. 

The temple sisters love talking to brides and scheduling dates. They are excited to help in anyway so don't hesitate to ask them questions, and certainly don't be embarrassed if you call them a few times in a day. I had to call at least three times trying to schedule my date and time. 

Many of you probably won't have an opinion on the sealer, but some might. I have a good family friend who is a sealer in the Portland Temple and I wanted him to seal us. I had to make sure he was either scheduled to work that day or that he could be there to perform the ceremony. Also, if you do want a certain sealer it is nice to call them and ask them if they would be willing to officiate in the sealing.

You will also want to consider who you want as the witnesses. Your bishop might talk to you about this when you meet with him, but usually it's your fathers. Also, when you get your endowments out and the day of your wedding, you will have an escort who is already endowed. She will help you get ready and guide you throughout the experience. This person is usually your mom, but if your mother isn't available it can be a close friend or relative. 

Also keep in mind, even though you're getting married in the temple you still need a marriage license.  You can bring that when you get your endowments out. There is so much happening on your wedding day, it is so easy to forget so I recommend giving it to them early. Some states require a serological test. Find out if your state requires this or not and get this done. I will talk more about this at a later date.

The temple will also ask you if you're planning to wear your wedding dress in the temple for the sealing. If you are, they have certain rules and guidelines.

• It must have long sleeves
• It has to be white, not ivory or cream
• There can't be a train on it or it has to be detachable
• It can't have a low neckline and it has to be long in length

Most brides don't end up getting married in their actual wedding dress. Most wear the dress that is part of their temple clothes that they wear in the endowment session. If you are wanting your dress delivered to the temple beforehand, they can store it in the bride's room for you so it's there when you get there. Just let the temple know this in advance so the attendants can look for your dress' arrival.

If you have a lot of family who isn't able to go into the temple, you may consider having the ring ceremony part outside the temple. Or if this doesn't apply to you let the sealer know you want to have the ring ceremony included in the sealing.

I know this was a lot of information but hopefully it was helpful. Stay tuned for another post about what to expect for the actual wedding day at the temple.